Making children visible in the picture of family violence

Children are victim survivors in their own right. We know that family violence has significant impacts on children, young people and babies, even before they are born.

The changing paradigm echoes new research and understanding that places children at the forefront of family violence, rather than the periphery. We now understand so much more about the profound impacts of violence on children and young people than we ever have before. Importantly, we know that these impacts extend far beyond the immediate harm, and can include long-term effects on relationships, education, health, and wellbeing.

The most recent crime statistics (2023-2024) for Greater Bendigo show that children were present in 36% of family violence incidents attended by police. Of the 2,589 family violence incidents that police attended, there were children present at 932 of these.  We also note that family violence continues to be significantly unreported, and these figures only represent incidents where police were present.[1]

The signs are often subtle: clinginess in a toddler, aggression in a school-aged child, anxiety in a teen. These behaviours may be misunderstood or dismissed as “just a phase,” but for children experiencing family violence, they are symptoms of deep, invisible wounds. A baby who cannot sleep, a child who lashes out at classmates, a teenager who disengages from school—these are not isolated behavioural issues. They are often desperate expressions of trauma.

Family violence doesn’t only happen in the shadows. Its ripple effects can be found in classrooms, in doctors’ offices, and in playgrounds. The impacts on children are not just emotional or social, they are physical, neurological, and long-lasting. Research shows that trauma from family violence can disrupt brain development and trigger a chronic stress response in children. This can impair their ability to learn, manage emotions, and build healthy relationships, with consequences that can stretch across their lifespan.[2]

Importantly, the presence of family violence in a child’s life doesn’t always look like bruises or shouting. It can be the gnawing tension of unpredictable moods, the absence of a parent too emotionally depleted to engage, or the fear of becoming the next target. A child may be used as a pawn or blamed as a cause. Even if they are not the direct focus of abuse, children absorb its impacts: through missed milestones, illness, self-harm, or risky behaviours. These are not acts of rebellion.

They are calls for help.

ANROWS CEO Tessa Boyd has stated:

“Too often, children and young people’s experiences of violence are invisible in policy and practice. This guide reminds us that they are not just ‘witnesses’ but victims and survivors in their own right. Their voices, strengths, and needs must shape the systems designed to protect them. Ending violence requires us all to commit to policies that are informed by the lived realities of children and young people experiencing violence in their homes.”[3] Yet despite growing evidence, our systems are still catching up. The Victorian Royal Commission into Family Violence revealed that around 80% of child protection cases involve family violence, a figure that is now believed to be even higher. This isn’t just a child protection issue, it’s a community crisis. And it demands that we see children not as secondary victims, but as victim survivors in their own right.

To truly support these children, we must centre their voices and experiences in every aspect of our response. That means going beyond blanket solutions. It requires recognition that children and young people experience unique risk factors.

Dr Georgena Dimopoulos, a leading socio-legal scholar on children’s rights and participation in family law, says “There is no ‘one size fits all’.”[4] A child’s safety isn’t just about locks on doors, it’s about emotional stability, routine, connection, and hope. Children must be given the chance to tell their stories, to identify what makes them feel safe, and to help shape the systems designed to protect them.

What to do – how you can help:

• Listen – if a child makes a disclosure to you listen to what they are saying.   Hearing a child’s voice is important in supporting them through family violence.
• Observe/take notes – if you have concerns around a child, take notes of this, document your concerns – this can help if you need to make a report or a referral for a child
• Act –
  • if a child is at imminent risk from family violence call police – 000
  • if you believe a child is at serious/immediate risk from family violence you can make a report to Child Protection.  Reporter details are kept confidential.  – Child protection contacts – DFFH Services
  • for a secondary consult or if you are unsure if you need to make a report to Child Protection you can contact your local Orange Door – Support near you | orangedoor.vic.gov.au
  • link victim/survivors or People Using Violence with support from the following services – Family violence statewide support services | vic.gov.au
• Partner – even if you’ve made a report or referral for a family, it is important that you continue to provide both the child and their protective parent with support.  This could include, safety planning, emotional support, check ins etc.

[1] Crime Statistics Agency, December 2024, Family Violence Dashboard, https://www.crimestatistics.vic.gov.au/family-violence-data/family-violence-dashboard

[2] Safe and Equal, Supporting children and young people, Retrieved 5 August 2025,

https://safeandequal.org.au/working-in-family-violence/tailored-inclusive-support/children-and-young-people/

[3] Gillfeather-Spetere, S., & Watson, A. (2024). In their own right: Actions to improve children and young people’s safety from domestic, family and sexual violence (ANROWS Insights, 01/2024). ANROWS.

[4] Southern Cross University, August 2024, Victoria’s family violence system is failing children: new report, Retrieved 5 August 2025, https://www.scu.edu.au/news/2024/family-violence-system-in-victoria/